12 Comments

Now here’s a thing. In gender neutral toilets (like homes) it should be the norm that men sit down to pee. It’s not difficult for them. It’s cleaner and makes for a more hygienic environment. Have you noticed those spots of rust on the radiators in toilets? Caused by male pee spray - a fine invisible spray that gets around however good an aim he is standing. Told us by a plumber many years ago who advised all his clients to sit down to pee. Lest this should seem only slightly relevant to Julie's post - the underlying point is that, once again, there's an assumption that women will adapt their behaviour to accommodate males, rather than the other way round. And again, it's worth making the point that in the majority of homes it's the women who end up cleaning the toilet. If men had to do it they might get the point.

Expand full comment

The bias toward accommodating men illustrates that the trans movement is about men's wants and desires. Wherever the two sexes come into a relationship of tension or conflict, it's the male's needs and preferences that dominate. But in today's world, saying so would get me cancelled for being a transphobe and a misogynist.

Expand full comment

So proud to say my husband has always sat down to wee and told my

Son he must do the same. Never had to clear wee up from sea and floor until my father with dementia moved in. Couldn’t believe what my

Mother had had to put up with all those years. Right mess.

Expand full comment

You are right that sitting down is better because it is cleaner. A public men's restroom is usually unpleasant, and the urinals are usually vile.

Expand full comment

Thanks for the info.

Expand full comment

If the venue really aimed to provide what its customers wanted it would provide women only toilets in abundance, with others catered for in whatever way suited them. Obviously they are catering for what men want, and they haven’t got around to dealing with what the other half of their customers want yet. If ever.

Expand full comment

I know some women who call themselves TERFs who think 'gender neutral' loos are a good compromise, in part, they say, because some more 'masculine' presenting women have in the past been mistaken for men and ejected from the Ladies. I guess if we had endless resources we should provide these GN loos, but without those resources we end up with the Ladies being converted to 'gender neutral' and the men's being left as is, or all the loos being made GN and women being disadvantaged by that, as men in our spaces present a risk to our sense of privacy and safety and we have zero interest in being in proximity to men going to the toilet, while the same cannot be said for men. Had they kept the women's single-sex and made the men's GN, that would have been a better compromise, especially for women. But we couldn't have that, I guess. Funny name, Amy Lame. Perhaps she should get into comedy and out of politics.

Expand full comment

Check. Noted at the Garrick Theatre this weekend: toilet doors free of sex or gender, but labelled ‘Cubicles (4)’ and ‘Urinals (2)’. With illustrations!

Expand full comment

Just to clarify - that was two different locations in the theatre.

Expand full comment

So proud to say my husband has always sat down to wee and told my

Son he must do the same. Never had to clear wee up from seat and floor until my father with dementia moved in. Couldn’t believe what my

Mother had had to put up with all those years. Right mess.

Expand full comment
founding

As part of my duties as a bookstore clerk back in the late 90s, I sometimes had the unpleasant task of doing a basic cleaning of the toilets because we couldn't afford a janitorial service. I can attest to the fact the men's toilets were disgusting and smelly and just really appallingly awful. Women are MUCH cleaner, more respectful and in general less problematic users of public restroom facilities, and should not have to share those facilities with men.

Expand full comment

I write as a retired teacher of young children. I was, and probably still am, a mandated reporter of sexual assault on a child. I did make that call to the state 3 times. It is anguishing, because you know officers of the law have to knock on the door and take a child out of the home, crying, screaming. Because the child told a teacher, or asked, about "the bubbles in my mouth," and you get it. Some adult male relative, in one case, the father, used this child's mouth in his masturbation ritual. Then the child falls apart in court and you are accused of something, something, as a teacher. You know that some children become schizophrenic after this history, you took that course. I worked for 3 years with the child psychologist hired by NYC to provide counseling in school and outside of school to the most deviously abused children. And my former husband says he's me, the mother of our children. A new troll on my channel again claimed I am "so bitter about a divorce from 30 years ago." Obviously, he hadn't watched more than 5 minutes. I decided, in response, to make a video for police officers:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N6ilNqUtjyA&t=7s

Expand full comment